This House Would Clone Extinct Species

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The 23rd Ordinary Meeting of the Literary and Scientific Society took place on the 8th of May in the Senate Room.

Viorel Vlad, Owen Wright and Beth Malcolmson stood in proposition of cloning extinct species. Vlad stated that many aspects of biology being researched are linked and come together and we won’t know how much we can achieve until we do something. Owen continued by stating that by cloning extinct species we would rectify some of humanities mistakes. By increasing biodiversity we could be lead to medical cures. Malcolmson stated that the fact it is possible is reason enough to clone and that it is a process that will constantly improve. She said it was our responsibility to bring back species but that it should be a heavily regulated process.

Nic Brinza, Nick Millington and Derek Crosby spoke for opposition. Brinza admitted that in the past he got caught up in the awesome prospect of having pet dinosaur but that this just showed our susceptibility to only seeing the good but ignoring the dangers. Millington told the House that all cloning extinct species would do was to perfect the technique, but that our environment would gain nothing by bringing a species back. Crosby’s closing remarks focused on cloning angering God and that’s why he hit dinosaurs with a giant rock and some stuff about humans being a hardcore species covered in the hide of others.

The debate then went to the floor, a vote and the motion passed.

Comedy Debate: This House Would Be a Student

The 21st Ordinary Meeting of the 165th session of the Literific took place on the 3rd of April in the Senate Room. The motion was This House Would Be a Student and saw three comedians battle against three students. Oh yeah.

George Quinn opened the debate for the supposedly funny people. He talked about how depressing his life is but more importantly there was magic. He said students are lucky to do what they like, to not have a job and to not have to feel guilty about it. Viorel Vlad spoke from a postgraduate point of view, remembering the days of undergraduate. We need people with all that time on their hands to progress humanity and serve you your food. Neil Dickson compared his life with that of his friends that went to university. He brought up the unique ability of students to go out five days a week and the greatness of learning about random stuff.

Cap’n Gallagher, going against his Union responsibilities, opened for the opposition. He argued that you can learn without a university and that uni is so messed up that this one has elected a crazy pirate as it’s union president. Emily Walker compared student life to old age, the ability to lie in bed all day, being able to have a carer, getting drugs for free, frickle frackling and lots of money to go wild with. Derek Crosby compared education to prison. He added not only do you learn most of your material from online sources over lectures but you will be an expert on nothing and everything you love will suffer. 

The debate then went to the floor. The motion passed on a vote.

This House Would Have a New Northern Irish Flag

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The 12th Ordinary meeting of the 165th session of the Literific took place on the 19th of December in the Elmwood Hall. It began with an opening address from the Secretary of State, Theresa Villiers. She talked about the importance of a united community – her entire speech is here as we probably could not do it justice.

Derek Crosby, Dr Dominic Bryan, Ciaran Gallagher and Tina McKenzie spoke in proposition of the motion. Crosby argued that the Union Jack and tricolour both cause divides in the community and suggest there is no Northern Ireland. Dr Bryan said that while dealing with the past was more important, a new flag would do little harm. Mr Gallagher decided that a flag would be a good foundation for progress, for harmony and peace. He commented that a flag is easier to change than the population. Tina McKenzie, NI21, said that the people of Northern Ireland are united in character and that the real problem is Stormont. She told the House that politicians wish to promote segregation.

Nigel Macauley, Conor Conneally, Trevor Ringland and Andrew Carruthers all spoke for the oposition. Macauley countered the idea that leadership needed to bring both communities together through a flag does not exist, that both communities are separated at birth and trying to force them together would cause riots. Conneally said that flags are boring and if both flags cannot be flown with both communities respecting each other then there should be none. Mr Ringland stated that instead of a flag, he asked that real change be made to tackle sectarianism. Carruthers agreed that time should not be wasted on a flag but to instead spend time to make real change, that a flag would just distract from the real problems.

The debate then went to the floor.
We then went to a vote, there were 34 nays, 4 abstentions and the motion passed with 38 ayes.